missing

I just got back from my trip home for the holidays, and I am reminded of why I left in the first place. I truly missed my family, but seeing other people from my past brought back a flood of memories and emotions.

This mainly revolves around one guy, my first love. Everything I thought I was over and done with all but hit me in the face as soon as I saw him. All of those old emotions, and might I add awkwardness, came right back to me. In trying to figure out why I couldn't seem to get past this, I realized that there was a lot of unfinished business there.

When we first got together, we both were way too young and not ready for a relationship. We broke up, got together, broke up...blah, blah, blah. We always seemed to be missing each other. And when one of us was available, the other was in another commitment. So, it was never going to work out, no matter how hard we tried. And as much as it pains me, I am coming to grips with this reality. I have moved on, and what happened back then has made me into who I am today. Everything happens for a reason. It may hurt again now, but I will soon have this door shut again...hopefully for good.

On a side note, I also went to the local bar in town. I saw many people I went to high school with...and many of whom thought they were really something back then. Did they really never leave that shit hole? I've gone and made something of myself, but what have they done? I can't imagine the despair I'd be feeling if I were in their shoes. Get off your asses and make something of yourselves. Life is way too short to be stuck in the past.

http://www.vevo.com/watch/robert-palmer/addicted-to-love/USUV70602523